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Put your crash helmet on, you’re going through the head board.

Do you believe in love at first sight…or do I have to walk by again?

There’s a gap in your life! Mind if I fill it!

I’m not Fred Flintstone but i can make your bedrock!

Wanna play Pearl Harbor?…

….That’s where I lay down and you blow the hell out of me.

Hey let’s go fuck and do the talking later.

Girl, how long have you been in the oven, cause I know I felt something rising.

Are you free tonight, or will it cost me?

Here’s 10p ring home and tell your mum that you wont be coming home tonight!

I’m new in town, can you give me directions to your flat?

Your daddy must have been a hunter because you’re a fox!

Hey, is your dad a terrorist? Cos baby, you’re the bomb!

Do you want to go and do what I’m going to tell my mates we did anyway?

I looked up sexy in the dictionary today and your name was listed

I lost my phone number, can I have yours?

Is it hot in here or is it you?

Fuck me if I’m wrong, but don’t you want to kiss me?

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together.

Do you know what’d look good on you? Me.

How about you sit on my lap and we’ll talk about the first thing that pops up?

I hope you know CPR, ’cause you take my breath away.

My face is leaving in fifteen minutes. Be on it.

Get your coat love, you’ve pulled.

I didn’t believe in angels until I meet you!

I have had a really bad day and it always makes me feel better to see a pretty girl smile. So, would you smile for me?

You are so hot, its girls like you that are the real reason for global warming

Hi, how do you like your eggs in the morning? Scrambled or fertilized?

Hi, my name’s Richard, will you be my Pretty Woman?

Have you ever been to the moon ? no ! sit on my rocket and I will take you there

If its cash your after drop your drawers and the moneys yours

Was you father a cement mixer? Because you sure make me hard.

Can you fix watches? Then put 2 hands on that!

I’m like Domino’s Pizza, if you don’t come in 30 minutes the next one is free…

You’re like a Pringles. Once I pop you, I can’t stop you!

Are you from Tennessee? Because you’re the only ten I see!

Do you like jewelry? Suck this, it’s a gem!

You’ve got 206 bones in your body, want one more?

do u believe in love at first site or do i have to walk by again

if i said u had a hot body would u hold it against me

My magical watch says you aren’t wearing any underwear! Oh, you are? It must be an hour fast.

”r ur legs tired”? coz uve been runnin through my mined all day

There are 256 bones in your body! Would u like another?

if i cood re arrange da alphabet i wood put u and i together

ive lost my teddy bear…….do u want to sleep with me tonight?

is youre father a robber ? well who stole the stars and put them in ure eyes ?

U gotta B a parking ticket or something coz u got the word FINE written All over ya!

im no fred flintstone but i’ll make ur bedrock

SMS Greetings

☻BLINKING STARS
FreNz r 4-evER liKE E starS taT kePt blinkin In E sky. THoUgh we MighT b Far Apart.. BUt I noE taT u r Still Near 2 Me WhnEveR I look up… Gd nite N sleep TiTE

 

☻ TIME TO SLEEP
LyinG oN mY BeD, LoOkiN @ ThE CloCk, I nOe tAt iTs timE 2 zzz. I WonDeR HoW hAv U bEEn todaY… HopE Tat EveryTHinG is FInE.. WiSh u sweeT dReaMz n Sleep TiGhT!

 

☻ MORNING GREETING
Morning greetings doesn’t only mean saying Gd Morning, it has asilent message saying: I remember you when I wake up! Have a nice day!

 

☻ MORNING GIFT
Receive my simple gift of ‘GOOD MORNING’ wrapped with sincerity, tied with care and sealed with a prayer to keep u safe and happy all day long! Take Care!

☻ GOOD MORNING
A night hug warms the heart, a night kiss brightens the day, and a good morning to start your day!

 

☻ NITE HAS END…Nite has end for another day, morning has come in a special way. May you smile like the sunny rays and leaves your worries at the blue blue bay.
 

☻ THINGS TO NOTE B4 SLEEPING
ThinGs 2 TaKe NoTe WheN u SleeP: 1st-MiSS Me, 2nd-ThInk oF Me, 3rd-HuG Me, 4th-LoVE mE. TrY 2 SlEEp NoW & ClOSe Ur EyeS. Get PrePaReD 2 DrEaM oF mE! Gd NiTe!
 

☻ HELLO
The Word ‘Hello’ means H=How R U? E=Everything all right? L=Like 2 hear 4rm U. L=Love 2 C U soon. O=Obviously, I miss you!

 

☻: I PRAY 4 YOU
In tis lovely nite, I pray 2 the blue moon 2 protect U thru the nite, the wind 2 blow away ur stress N the twinkle stars 2 guide U the way, sweet dreams Gd Nite

 

☻ GOOD MORNING
The sun rises into the sky with the warmest smile, he wishes you a good morning, hoping that you have the perfect day. Take care & miss you.

 

☻ NO MATTER
No matter the sky is black or blue, no matter there’s stars or moon, as long as ur heart is true, sweet dreams will always be wif u. Gd Nite!
 

☻ TIME 4 BED
da starz r out, da moon is up, 1 more HUG, 1 more smile, KISS u once, KISS u twice, now itz time 4 bed. Close ur @@, n sleep tite!

 

☻ I CARE MOST
I was looking out the windows thinking about the person I care most & the person that came into my mind is U so juz wanna wish u good nite…….

 

☻ STARS LIGHT
Stars light Stars bright u’re the only Star I see tonite. I wish I may. I wish I might be there guarding ur dreams tonite, gd nite sweet dreams

 

☻ NICE FRIENDS
A day is going to end again. It is nice to have a friend like U making my everyday seems so great. Thank U my good friend lastly gd nite n sweet dreams…

 

☻ WASH UP
Wash your face and wash your feet! Now itz time 2 fall asleep. Yours eyes are weak N mouth can’t speak so hope tis nite shall b nice and sweet. Good Nite.

 

☻ COLD COLD NITE
On this cold cold nite,in My small small rOOm,i Look At The Brite Brite StArS iN tHe DaRk DaRk sKy & DrEaM of uR sWeet sWeet SmiLe on ur CuTe CuTe FaCe! GdNiTe!

 

☻ WINDOWS OF SOUL
Tireness draws across the mind making the body fade flexibility n soon windows of soul begin 2 close N enter the dreamland! OYASUMINASAI! Sweet Dreams!

 

☻SOUL BACK FROM DREAMLAND
Your soul came back from dreamland reunited with a sleeping senseless piece of yourself slowly open ur eyes realise its a brand new day. Good Morning.

 

☻ DRACULA KISS
As u go 2 bed 2nite, I ordered bats 2 guard u tight. I told some ghosts to dance in white, & 2 make sure u r alryt, i’LL ask dracula 2 kiss ur neck goodnight..

 

☻ LAZY BONE WAKE UP!
The sun has once brought brightness to earth! lazy bone. it’s time 2 wake up gd morning…

 

☻ AS NITE FALLS
As nite falls upon the land, it is time 2 Zz again. With the moon hangin in the starlit sky, i’m here 2 wish U NiteNite! Sweet dreams, cover blanket tight tight

 

☻ THE SUN HAD RISED
The sun had rised from the east & birds r singing happily & butterflies R around the flowers. It is time to wake up & give a big yawning & say gd morning to u..

 

☻ SOMEWHERE OUT THERE
somewhere out there beneath the pale moon light someone thinkin of u somewhere out there where dreams come true… nitenite & sweet dreams 2 u

 

☻ MASTER OF PUPPETS

Master of puppets is pulling ur strings, twisting ur mind n smashing ur dreams. blinded by me, u can’t c a thing when i count to 3 u shall fall asleep 1,2,3,Zzz

 

Q & A Jokes
 

☻Q. WHAT DO YOU CALL A WOMAN WHO KNOWS WHERE HER HUSBAND IS EVERY NIGHT?

A. WIDOW

☻Q. WHY AMERICANS STOP PRINTING STAMPS WITH PHOTO OF PAMEELA ANDERSON?

A. COZ PEOPLE STARTED LICKING THE WRONG SIDE OF IT FOR PASTING THEM ON THE ENVELOPES.
☻Q. WHAT DOES 98 STAND FOR IN WINDOWS 98?

A. IT STANDS FOR NUMBER OF TIMES IT HANGS IN A DAY.

☻Q. WHY DID BANTA SINGH TAKE HIS PREGNANT WIFE TO PIZZA CORNER?

A. FOR FREE DELIVERY.

☻Q. WHY DID SANTA SING TAKE OFF HIS CLOTHES WHILE WRITING EXAMS?

A. COZ IT WAS WRITTEN IN THE PAPER”ANSWER IN BRIEF.

☻Q. WHAT IS THE HEIGHT OF LAZINESS?

A. A COUPLE ADOPTING A CHILD.

 

☻Q. WHAT IS THE HEIGHT OF POSSESSIVENESS?

a. constiPATION.

☻Q. HOW WOULD YOU IDENTIFY BANTA SINGH IN A SUBMARINE?

A. HE WILL BE THE ONLY ONE WITH A PARACHUTE TIED TO HIS BACK.

☻q. what would you call a sardar with just one hair on his head?

a. iqbal singh.

☻Q. HOW TO MAKE TTK LAUGH ON SUNDAY?

A. BY TELLING HER A JOKE ON THURSDAY.

ONCE A NUN GOES FOR A URINE EXAMINATION AND THE SAMPLES GET MIXED UP. the report indicates she is pregnant. WHEN SHE GETS THE REPORT, SHE EXCLAIMS, “OH JESUS!! NOW WE CAN NOT EVEN RELY ON CANDLES”

☻Q. WHAT DID BANTA SINGH SAY WHEN HE SAW A BANANA PEEL?

A. “OH! I AM GOING TO SLIP AGAIN.

 

☻Wot’s the best thing about babies ?
MAKING THEM !

☻If i guard you with my life,
Will u be my wife ?

☻Girls are like roads,
More the curves,
More the dangerous they are.

☻Love is Photogenic,
it needs darkness to develop.

☻Messages are given to
Those who are apart
But what shall i give
When you are in my heart.

☻Q. WHICH IS THE SHORTEST JOKE?

A. SANTA SINGH AND BANTA SINGH PLAYING CHESS.

☻Q. WHICH BROTHER OF KALIDAS MAKES SHOES?

A. ADIDAS